Monday, August 18, 2008

Remember When?

I love to receive those nostalgic emails about life in the Fifties. All the Teabury Gum, and nickel Cokes, and wax lips, presented in a Rock n' Roll wonderland where all the guys acted like Fonzie and high school was exactly like "Grease." Ah yes, the innocent Fifties, where virginal Bobby-Soxers abounded and life was "On the Beach" and survival was in a fallout shelter. I guess it's in my nature to remember adolescence a bit differently, so I present to you a different view of that Dick Clark decade, and wonder, do you...

Remember When
the first time your parents told you, "everybody dies?"

Remember When
Your pajamas with the built-in feet were recalled for lack of flame retardant?

Remember When
Every other commercial on television or ad in a magazine was for cigarettes, and they told you they were good for you? Now, 50 years later, and you can still recite tobacco slogans like, "LSMFT," "Winston Tastes Good Like A Cigarette Should," and "Call For Phillip Morris." You've come a long way, baby.

Remember When
You were taught in school to hide under your desk in case of a nuclear attack, and you figured out by age 7 that your ass was as good as fried and the human race could be obliterated at any moment, so what the hell?

Remember When
The air-raid sirens on top of public buildings went off every Saturday at noon, and you were never sure if it was a test or if the Russians figured out the best time to attack was noon, Saturday?

Remember When
Ike's government electrocuted Julius and Ethel Rosenberg for show, setting off a wave of anti-Semitism and orphaning two children, when the "atomic secrets" they passed to the Russians were the same "secrets" that the Soviet's Nazi scientists were only a few months behind our Nazi scientists in discovering in the first place; and no one said a thing about it.

Remember When
You were taught to believe that dropping two atomic weapons on a civilian population was justified, and saved lives?

Remember When
All your grade school and high school teachers were borderline senile Christian fanatics and they were allowed to beat you?


Remember When
You were taught that the police were your friends, until personal interaction proved they were liars, thugs, and racists?






Remember When
Hitching a ride was considered to be safe until that guy grabbed your inner thigh and you had to fight him to get out of the car?




Remember When
That first time you found your Dad's dirty books?

Remember When
If you dropped the phone, you could break your foot?

Remember When
Every family on your street had a maid that worked for wages so low, that if your parents tried to pay that today, they would be arrested. And since there were no retirement plans or Social Security, the maids worked until they died?

Remember When
The racist system threw Chuck Berry in prison because he drove across the state line with an underage girl in the car?

Remember When
The government drafted Elvis into the Army, when no one famous ever got drafted, effectively ending the rebellious age of Rock n' Roll and killing Gladys Presley in the process, and The Colonel let them do it and insisted that Elvis go along and be a grunt?

Remember When
Your city government started to tear down 100 year old palatial homes and historic buildings to make room for fast food restaurants, until every major city has turned into the exact same aesthetically offensive strip mall.


Remember When
Most of the public school Art and Music teachers were gay, but nobody made a big deal about it?




Remember When
Your Dad used to curse at the "women drivers?"



Remember When
You had to re-learn the silly, sing-song "Pledge of Allegiance" because the politicians voted to put the words "Under God" in there, and you couldn't understand why you were swearing personal loyalty to a piece of cloth in the first place? And finally.......

Remember When
You grew your hair long, and your parents kicked you out? Oops sorry, that was the 60s.

The Fifties; that grand decade right after the Forties.

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

remember when they dumped raw sewage directly into the Wolf River?

was ok earlier in the day said...

dear Nasty---As I read this most recent blog I began to wonder:
1. Has he allowed his Proton Pump Inhibitor prescription to lapse?
2. Did he have to endure more than 2 people in the course of less than 15 minutes stepping on his gouty left great toe while standing in an overly long line to get his gout medication?
3. Was he caught in way too long a conversation with the woman who had carried him in her uterus for 9 months lo those many years ago and now is feeling some of the more insidious after effects?
4. All of the above.

Yikes, RJ. Fill your script for God's sakes.
much,
ghg

Amsterdam 68 said...

Funniest thing....my 82 year old neighbor just stopped over to ask me something and when I saw him at the door I scowled and said, "what the hell are you smiling at, old man?!!"

Felt great.
l,
Thrupence's roommate

wt said...

amen..........i was there thru it all..........

Anonymous said...

That polio vaccine was sort of annoying too.

Father farken said...

Remember when you loaded up the car to go to the Malco Theatre for the late night (2nd show)of the rhythym & blues revue where the Caucasians sat in the (crow's nest) while the Blacks had the best seats in the house to see Bo Didley, Fats, The Platters, a Skinny B.B. King, Chuck Berry, Lavern Baker and Ruth Brown all in one show.
Remember when 20,000 plus would fill Crump Stadium to watch a highschool football game ...most especially if the fish eating immigrants of Christian Brothers or Catholic were playing.
Remember when Eddie Fisher
came to Memphis to usher in the Cotton Carnival but everybody was at the Ellis Auditorium to be electrified by a young Elvis Presley.

Remember 40 years ago this Sept. when Ark. Gov. Orval Faubus misused The National Guard by trying to prevent 9 precious black children from intergrating Little Rock Central High School & it took a Republican President named Eisenhower to federalize the entire Arkansas Nat. Guard... taking it away from Faubus so that black students could enter the school under the protection of 1,000 members of the 101st Airborne Division of the United states Army.

Remember when wrestling was like a passion play where Messianic figure Billy Wicks would offer up his body as a living sacrifice in our behalf to battle the Boogieman Sputnik Monroe so that Memphis could be the Land of milk & honey & all
sorts of Shalom!

Remember when Sam Philips' Sun Records & Dewey Phillips' Red Hot & Blue & Rufus Thomas'radio programs ushered in the most important world wide music revolution of all time.

Remember hell! As a World Renowned Bellybumper & Carl Perkens Tribute Artist...I still buy my clothes at Lansky Brothers.

The Peace of the Lord To All! Father Fergus Farken

Anonymous said...

Remember when America was relatively sane and you could go most anywhere at any time of day or night and be safe? That era lasted until civil rights legislation was passed, and unleashed a tidal wave of crime which has completely inundated the country and will continue forever.

TD said...

GHG MUST
BE A FUCKING REPUBLICAN. I WAS THERE AND YOU ARE RIGHT ON.
TD

Anonymous said...

First of all GHG,get a grip for god sakes.Jeez louise,I'm afraid if you had a sence of humor it has somehow left you.Just enjoy the "shit" and have fun. And then there is the racist asshole that just had to interject his nasty venum, why can't you people(yes I mean all you racist assholes)just lighten up and try to get along. If you haven't noticed we are all different and that's okay.I'm sick of all of it,we will all live alonger and happier lives if we would just lighten up and have some fun. Silly isn't it, but what a great idea.And it's free. Hell I'm smiling now just thinking about all this.

Anonymous said...

Race is merely one's extended family. Blacks understand this perhaps better than anyone. How come whites are the only race that is forbidden to acknowledge this fundamental reality? Could the underlying reason possibly be to disempower them so that their wealth and power can be ransacked as long as the ruse is perpetuated? I believe that this is so and I for one am not afraid to speak truth to the alien power that is perpetrating this scam. For some reason liberals get hopping mad when ideas which oppose theirs are presented. Their precious tolerance goes right out the window. Now why do you suppose that is the case? Perhaps it is because they are totalitarian down deep in their hearts. Too deep for many of them to realize it.

Anonymous said...

Of course liberals are totalitarian. That is why they don't like the market place of free ideas and the democratic means of determining our course. They would rather have judges appointed who are sympathetic to their agenda and who mandate decrees from the bench, rather than to have our course charted by the free vote. They would rather have an oligarchy of like-minded liberal judges who would implement their wishes rather than to have a free country. After all they know what is 'best' for everyone.

Father Farken said...

To anon. 8/18/08 @ 6:45pm!
I love your spirit! We should all learn from you & remember the words of our LORD, "You are the light of the world! SO LIGHTEN UP!" To the racist asshole! THOUGH WE ALL FALL SHORT...all are created in G*D'S IMAGE! When you tear down people because of their ETHNOS or color of their skin...you are tearing at the very heart of G*d...& you are destroying your very soul! May G*d forgive us of all racism & be ministers of reconciliation. Anon. 6:45 Sputnik is blessed to have friends like you. BLESSINGS! GO AND PISS! FrFarken

Anonymous said...

It's not really racism, it is culturism. People that edify and maintain civilization come from all races and those that tear civilization down come from all races. Now, if you want to quantify each race's part in the building up or tearing down of civilization that is another story. I guess you could use Africa as a yardstick. And, I am afraid that conditions in Africa are giving us a preview of what America's future is going to be like. All we have to do is sit back and watch the horror show unfold.

Shecky Kierkegaard McGirk said...

To my good friend FrFarken! Little Rock Central was intergrated 51 years ago...not 40! I do realize that you are right brain dominant & that math is not your strong suit and that the mind is the second thing to go! Do you realize that you ended your comment with GO & PISS and not GO IN PEACE! Friends for life! SHECKY K. McGIRK

Father Farken said...

THANKS SHECKY FOR THE CORRECTION! BUT WASN'T IT INTERESTING THAT IT WAS A DEMOCRAT GUV TAKING A STAND AGAINST CIVILIZATION & THAT A REPUBLICAN PREZ IN THE 50's TAKING A STAND FOR CIVIL RIGHTS! ABOUT THE BENEDICTION (GO & PEACE! or GO IN PEACE!)...AT MY AGE IT'S NOT AN EITHER/OR SITUATION...IT'S A MUCH NEEDED BOTH/AND BENEDICTION! BLESS YOUR HEART & PEACE ON YAH! FrFergusFarken

Shecky Kierkegaard McGirk said...

AND ALSO WITH YOU.....GO AND PISS!

Randy said...

For Mr. Anonymous 8:39. Remember when George Wallace stood in the schoolhouse door to block the admission of a black student to the University of Alabama? Think something like that caused racial resentment and prevented blacks from getting the education they deserved? Maybe if Wallace, Faubus, Eastland, Lester Maddox, and the rest had opened the doors to education 10 yrs. earlier, when the Supreme Court ordered desegregated public education, we wouldn't have this gulf between the races that we see today. Maybe a bit of familiarity a little earlier could have dampened down the irrational racial hatred that hangs on to the south like an incurable virus that continues to spread.

Father Farken said...

Randy! I couldn't agree with you more! Blessings!

Anonymous said...

Oh, Father Farken, you warm the cockles of me heart.How did you become so good.We should all listen to your message for awhile it sure couldn't hurt. Peace and happiness for ALL. Yeah I could go for a dose of that. Too bad the RACIST can't grasp that idea. Oh well,bless his little pea-pickin' heart.Peace on ya, MS. SUNSHINE RAINBOW

Mr. Natural said...

The root problem isn't really race. It is the influence of Satan upon the human spirit. There is one fundamental cause of the problems that plague us and that is Satan. And only real cure is Christ. Education, politics, re-distribution of wealth, etc. will have no influence on human evil in all of its forms. Christ alone holds the power to eradicate human evil whether individually or collectively. I am sure that this statement will please no one but Father Farken. The rest of you will probably gnash your teeth and cry for me to be crucified...but, God bless you anyway.

jazzdad said...

all this talk about race and religion

I can only quote the late Jim Capaldi

" Either light up or leave me alone"

Father Farken said...

Well, we've gone from "lighten up!" to "light up!" and it has taken a dead drummer from Traffic to do it! A Brit at that! Forgive me JAZZDAD but its been atleast 36 years since my last "inhale"...if you don't count the second- hand smoke from an occasional concert or an outdoor Folk Mass. But I'll lift a pint of Guinness with you in a heartbeat!
And you bring up a good point...that Race is no issue! It is simple! There is but One - The Human Race! What's all the hoopla?
The Apostle Paul told the people of Athens that "G*d created every race of men (meaning humanity) of one stock to inhabit the whole earth's surface." FROM ONE COMMON ORIGIN, ONE SOURCE, ONE BLOOD...G*D CREATES EVERY RACE OF PEOPLE. Racial differences...they are just part of the variety & goodness of G*d's creation. The Scriptures use other categories: nations, culture, religion & clan but these differences are cultural not biological. Physical characteristics are simply an unimportant but beautiful-fact of life. G*d's purpose is to bring a new humanity into being. Father Abraham was given the promise that through his descendants all the ETHNOS of the Earth would be blessed. In Jesus, the wall of hostility has been destroyed, making them one people. When the Isralites were liberated from Egypt, they were made into one people. By his death & resurrection, Jesus freed us from all evil forces that make for division. It is sad that some Christians know that Christ has reconciled us to G*d but have not the foggiest idea that Christ has reconciled us to each other! The good news is THAT THE RACIAL WALLS OF HOSTILITY ARE BROKEN DOWN! Our hope is our NEW JERUSALEM...THE NEW CREATION of justice & peace of liberated & humble men& women in reconciled relationships, from every race, tribe, nation & language. Those who share the hope of this New Creation will practice its values & attitudes now. When they do- cities might just be changed....even Memphis!
Mr. Natural! Come down from that cross! We all love Yah! About the devil! AW SCREW THE DEVIL! The peace of the Lord! Fr. Fergus Farken