Monday, June 04, 2012

Almost Cut My Hair

Ordinarily, the school days hi-jinks of the  candidates for the highest office are irrelevant, unless you're George W. Bush and you've gone AWOL from your national guard unit for over a year. But a couple of stories surfaced last month, each about the two presidential contenders' youthful student "pranks," which may help shed light on the mens' characters. The first investigative piece was about Barack Obama's liberal use of herbaceous materials as a student at Occidental College; the second concerned Mitt Romney's assault on a long-haired classmate when he was a senior at an elite prep school in Bloomfield, Michigan. According to witnesses, young Mitt was incensed at the appearance of an eccentric young man who had the gall to grow his hair long. Romney led a group of students through a residential dormitory until they found the offending party, tackled him and pinned him to the ground, while Mitt hacked away at his hair with a scissors. The rueful participants claimed it was something they could "never forget," except for the Barber of Bloomfield who said, "I don't recall the incident myself, but I've seen the reports and I'm not going to argue with that." Unfortunately, the victim of the attack, John Lauber, who died in 2004, was unavailable for comment.

The revelations about Obama's school years come from Clinton biographer David Maraniss' new book, Barack Obama: The Story. College classmates claim that young Barack was a copious user of the "sticky-green," and invented novel ways in which to smoke it, including, "chooming a doobie." I had never heard that expression, but for the uninitiated, I would assume it's synonymous with "burning a fatty," or the "smoking of a marijuana cigarette." "Barry" was also known to invent some smoking trends; one called "T.A." short for "total absorption." Another was called "roof hits," where a bunch of guys smoked pot in a car with all the windows sealed, until they tilted their heads back and inhaled the remaining smoke from the cloud in the ceiling above. Obama also had the tendency to leap forward in a pot circle shouting, "Intercepted," and take a hit out of turn, but one schoolmate said, "No one seemed to mind." I appreciate an imaginative leader that takes the initiative. If Barack had hung around some of my crazy friends, they could have taught him "the shotgun," and "inside the paper bag." The major outcry over these stories has come not so much from social conservatives as from pot smokers who object to Obama allowing the DEA to shut down medical marijuana dispensaries in California, Colorado, Montana, and Washington.

The stories about Mitt Romney's prep school days at the Cranbrook School, first reported in The Washington Post, are far more troubling. Mitt is my same age, so when I say that I know guys like Romney, I mean I know guys exactly like Romney. When long-hair first came to Knoxville, there was an unexpected reaction from the locals. Rather than correctly assume that these were the same students as before who had just grown their hair out over summer vacation, some of the citizenry reacted as if they were under alien attack. There were accounts of roving Melungeons harassing the hippies, always in groups, including reports of malicious hair-cuttings similar to the Romney incident. Ultimately, there were areas of town that long-hairs learned to avoid. The single one-on-one confrontation I witnessed between a redneck and a hippie occurred when the former asked the latter if he was "a boy or a girl," which evoked a response of an anatomical nature that started a brawl in the Vol Market. Similarly, many students were disturbed that their college was changing from the drunken party school of renown into a haven for pot smokers and sandal wearers. The line of demarcation seemed to strike right in the middle of my age group, half succumbing to the hippie ethos, and half stubbornly clutching to their bottles of Jack Daniels. There was a lot of abuse and plenty of resistance from bullies like Romney, who could not accept the changes.

Among the students who accompanied Romney on his hair-cutting foray, one recently recounted the events for the record and said, "When you see somebody who is simply different taken down that way and is terrified and you see that look in their eye, you never forget it." Although Romney claims to have forgotten it, the remorseful rabble with him that night remembered returning to their rooms shouting in triumph. A witness claimed the event has "haunted him," and referred to it as "assault and battery." Confronting the accusations on Fox News, Romney explained, "As to pranks that were played back then, I don't remember them all, but again, high school days, I did stupid things...And if anyone was hurt by that or offended, obviously I apologise for that" Later, he expounded that some of his pranks "might have gone too far." I did stupid things in high school too, but that never included leading an assault on a hapless, helpless victim of non-conformity. I just did things like grow my hair long. Obama has publicly taken responsibility for his cocaine and pot use as a young man, yet Romney's the one who can't seem to remember anything.

Admittedly, Romney became an honor student at Brigham Young University where everyone looked like him: finely-coiffed, well-groomed, and white. No one to bully in Provo. In fact, the university had an honor code that included: no bad language, alcohol, tobacco, tea, or coffee, and to "observe dress and grooming standards, and live a chaste and virtuous life." The Mormon college also encouraged "undergraduate marriages," so Mitt married young. Nothing wrong with any of that, but here I had always thought that college was for raising hell and indulging in the pursuit of happiness, along with all those books and such. I believe that my college experience is more typical than Mitt Romney's. So is Barack Obama's, whose indulgences did potential harm only to himself and no one else. While Obama was doing "roof hits," Romney was doing post-mortem Mormon baptisms in Salt Lake City. Remember back when George Bush was running against Al Gore in 2000, and alot of people decided to vote for Bush because, "he was the kind of guy that you could sit down and have a beer with?" Well, Bush didn't drink beer, and neither does Mitt Romney, but if presidential preferences are determined by such inane attributes, I'd rather choom a doobie with Barack than be part of a hair-hacking posse led by the pampered and privileged son of a governor.

11 comments:

Alan said...

Only problem with the Romney story is that the family of the supposed victim says it never happened.

Anonymous said...

How can a 65 year old man be condemned for something that he did when he was 18? I am in my late 60's and I shudder to think about those days of gross excess. Unfortunately, I am still judged by some for what I was as a mindless, wreckless adolescent and it hurts. Can there be no forgiveness? Most of those who condemn Obama for his college drug use aren't really offended by it. Rather, it is just a low-blow political tactic. The issue is what he currently is and the same goes for Romney. I have more respect for Obama's honesty than I do for "I never inhaled" Clinton. If everyone were honest, I'll bet that there are plenty of congressmen, judges, and lawyers, etc. who indulged when they were younger. There is something about people who reform that incline them to be self-righteous toward those who have made the same mistakes. That is why it is said that we are always guilty of that which we condemn in others. In a nutshell that means that we are all mistake makers. We need to be more forgiving and certainly more honest. I do not mean to be heavy-handed, but that goes for you too Sput.

Anonymous said...

This is a digression, but please bear with me. I moved away from Memphis before Beale Street opened. I have visited there a few times when visiting friends. I noticed that there are plaques in the sidewalk that honor those who have contributed to Memphis music. I feel that Sput has not been adequately acknowledged for all that he has done to promote Memphis music as a musician, as a DJ, and as an accomplished journalist. He is getting to be an old man. I would love it if some of the influential people that he knows would come together and work toward his getting a plaque on Beale St. I feel that such a memorial would give him a great deal of satisfaction knowing that he would be remembered for many years for what he made of himself and what he did in the promotion of the music that he loves so much. I have decided to be a proponent of the good things that Sput has made of himself and of the good that he has done for others and to be more civil in my political critiques...life is more than meat. This blog is a venue mainly for Sput's family and friends and I have no right to barge in and say hurtful things. For that I apologize to Sput, his wife, and everyone else. I was wrong in doing so. Sometimes I can be an asshole, but I am trying to reform. The measure of a man's success in life is largely in terms of the good that he has done for others and in terms of the love that those he has touched will feel for him after he passes. According to that measure, Sput is a better man than I. I will still spar with him politically,though. I think that he enjoys a little bit of a challenge. If Sput gets a plaque on Beale St. I will make a special trip to Memphis just to see it. Justice will have been served.

Anonymous said...

Looking back on the hippie years I remember one glaring bit of hypocrisy. We tended to look down on the 'straights' as being, narrow, bigoted, and intolerant. Then we proceeded to be exceedingly narrow, bigoted, and intolerant toward them. We even resorted to some 'soft' bullying. Remember the game of 'freaking out the straights'? Remember how condescending and non-inclusive we were toward them for not being a part of the 'new consciousness'? But we insisted that we were purveyors of peace, unity, and love toward all. I still see some of that in today's Left. For instance, they believe in free speech...as long as that speech is in complete agreement with them. Otherwise, it is forbidden. Why the glaring hypocrisy? Especially when it is so flagrant and visible? Can anyone respect that? I was as guilty as anyone of hypocrisy in regard to the straights. However, I insisted that they had their place. Somebody had to embrace capitalism and the work ethic seriously enough to make all of the stuff that we used, like stereos, record albums, food, etc., etc. while we got stoned and played at being feckless hippies all day. Those who played that game too long are now on food stamps, and other forms of government assistance whining that capitalism doesn't give everyone a shot at being materially succesful and that people who worked, saved, etc. for their future are selfish for doing so. What is wrong with that picture? I believe that someone said long ago that we reap as we have sown. Is that no longer true? And is it cosmically right to reap where others have sown? That is even true of the capitalist pigs who are driving us toward world socialism so that they can be even bigger capitalist pigs...as in controlling all of the Earth's resources, capital, and labor. Does it bother the Left that Obama is in bed with the uber-capitalists on Wall St. and even internationally. Soros is one of his big international uber-capitalists donors who is driving the world to socialism. Don't you know that when world socialism is finally effected that 'Leftists' like Obama will have a seat within the oligarchy and be living like kings while the rest of us live in 'egalitarian' squalor? They will probably have a special holiday to commemortae the useful iditos who helped them realize their grand capitalistic scheme. This is where the worst of human nature is driving us while using a bogus claim of compassionate sharing as a ruse to get there. Ever think about how compassionate the Chinese, Russians, and Muslims are? Many of these will be part of the ruling oligarchy some day. They will not be very nice to the little people who helped them get where they are.

Anonymous said...

Well said Anon June 5. I'd like to comment on the walker recall election. Can you believe the way the libs are behaving? I have never seen tea party people behave that way.

Anonymous said...

The whole Tea Party vs the Occupiers issue as portrayed by the bogus mainstream media is a joke. The non-violent Tea Partiers who merely want a return to a constitutional republic and a balanced budget are villified as Nazis, haters, or worse, while the Occupiers who shit in the streets, fuck in public, rape, set fires, loot, and destroy property (they are mostly anarchists and Marxists) are extolled by the media and the Democrats as heroes. Back in the early 70's, Jesse Jackson who has spoken truth once or twice in his life, looked around a tent city of hippie miscreants the day after a Washington, D.C. protest. They were passed out from alcohol and drugs, in a state of utter squalor...filth everywhere. Jesse said as he viewed the scene that you couldn't build anything of value with such people. His words were prophetic. Did you see the video of the miscreants holding hands, surrounding the Wisconsin capitol building Oming to bring spiritual forces to bear to unseat Gov. Walker? Folks here don't put much stock in the New Age, but I can say as one who was involved deeply in it for 9 years that occultic mantras are actually invocative prayers to the demonic realm. But, the lower level practitioners are told that the mantras merely attune them to higher evolutionary forces. They are dupes who are being drawn into deeper levels of evil. I'll be stoned for saying these things, but I know the truth of what drives the entire New Age movement and it is a malignant evil. The Dems are perfectly Ok with this state of affairs.

Anonymous said...

Great repartee!

Anonymous said...

Great comments!

Gregg said...

I skipped the rest after I read the courage of Anon's comments on Randy Haspel being memorialized on Beale Street. There is something that a whole lot of people could get behind with ease, confident that they'd be doing what was irrevocably the right thing to do.
Anon, how do we get this going? Why don't you email me at my email address so we can have a private conversation about this.
gregggrinspan@yahoo.com

Anonymous said...

Dr. Gregg, this is Jerry. I may be a right wing nut, but I also have a sense of fair play. Sput's political views are only a small part of what he is as a person. Sometimes I get carried away and say some things that I shouldn't. But, I admire what Sput has made of himself over the course of his life. It takes a lot of entreprenuerial spirit to form a long-lived band. I understand that he has written some songs. I know that he is a damn good DJ and journalist, and I also believe that he has a good heart. I live a long way from Memphis and only return about once per year to visit old friends. So, there is no way that I could help in the endeavor. Besides, I don't think that I would be very welcome amongst Sput's crowd...I feel that I has poisoned the water. Actually, I was thinking in terms of folks like you and Father Farken, and the numerous influential friends and fans that he has made along the way to ramrod the plaque idea. Like I said before, I think that it would mean a lot to him to be finally recognized for his lifetime of devotion and influence upon Memphis music. If this can be pulled off, I will go to Beale St. to see the plaque when I visit my buddies. I am a bit schizoid in regard to Sput. Somewhere along the way I began to secretly admire him for what he has made of himself.

Anonymous said...

Come to think about it Sput may prefer that the plaque be dedicated to 'Randy and the Radiants'. That may also make it easier to get through the approval process, because it was Randy AND his bandmates that made their mark on Memphis music over the decades. The locals will know that he was the ramrod.